Dayum!

God it's been so freaking long since I've posted on my blog. The saddest part is that I've been spending most of my time with flip flops. I know, right? Emily and I are making flip flops to sell at a Young Entrepreneur's Market at the end of June. I told her we would do that and with the money we would have a girl's day out. I said we could go shopping and out to eat or whatever. Without missing so much as a half a beat she said, "WE COULD GO HAVE ONE OF THOSE DRINKS!!" A few weeks ago we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant close to the house. They had a list of non-alcoholic drinks on the table. She was immediately mesmerized. I said, "Emily. You're scaring me." Now it's all she thinks about. I'm going to start an Etsy shop with my flip flops, but I need to take pictures of them first. I think I have about 15 or so finished. It's been a long process but they're turning out really cute and I'm happy with my progress. If I could just get that Etsy shop opened!

I've also been working a bit more where Adam's been working less. He got called back to work but the weather had been so fucking rainy and wet that he can't work. This past week he worked one day. One lousy day. I'm ready for the rain to stop and the heat to begin.

I worked 2nd shift last night while all of my neighbors hung out and had way too many drinks. Drama ensued, as is always inevitable, and I've been up for the last couple of hours worried about a sister neighbor. I hope she's doing ok down there. Adam and I didn't go to bed until 3am and I laid there for a while while he worked hard to breathe. He's having a lot of trouble with his allergies tonight. I laid in bed so freaking wide awake that I couldn't take it anymore. So, here I am at 4:06 in the morning begging your forgiveness for being gone so long.

Well, I really have nothing better to say, I hope everyone is doing fine and has a lot less drama in their lives than I do!

My Mom's Day

Yesterday my sister had a Mother's Day dinner at her house. Besides me and my crew she also invited her mother and father-in-law and our dad. My sister's in-laws are really awesome people. They are so cute. I guess Friday was their 56th wedding anniversary and my sister called her MIL that night to wish her a Happy Anniversary and she had no idea what she was talking about. They had both forgotten about the day. I told her right then I was never going to let Adam do that. I expect something FABULOUS on EVERY anniversary, especially my 56th. Isn't the 56th Anniversary signified with a huge diamond ring, necklace and matching tennis bracelet? I'll have to check with Hallmark but I'm almost certain that I'm right. Just kidding Adam! Actually I'm not. No, I am. I'm kidding. Well, you'll just have to wait and see.

So we had a great dinner. My sister made lasagna and a salad and both were very good. For desert she had made chocolate creme pies. Yum! After dinner my cousin, her daughter and her daughter came over to visit with the in-laws. See, my sister and my cousin married two guys who are brothers. That means they have the same in-laws that I mentioned above. Our cousin was the first one to get married then 3 years later they had a baby. Two years after that my sister got married and that also meant that our 2nd cousin became my sister's niece. Confused yet? Good! It was fun getting to see my 2nd cousin's baby, Gracie. She's almost one and a half and has finally caught on to the whole walking on her own thing. She's very independent.

After all that we opened gifts. Adam had the kids paint rocks. They did an awesome job.




Both kids made me things at school too:






The purple card is from Emily. She apparently is a fan of my tuna and noodles. Hominy, notsomuch.

From my sister I got an Isabel Bloom statue called, "Memories"



She and the kids picked out this Willowtree figurine:



Also she got a wallet, which I'd love to show you a picture of, however blogger is being a bitch. Eff off blogger.

On Saturday we all went to the farmer's market where a lady had a booth for kids to decorate a pot and plant a Marigold for their moms for Mother's Day.



My dad had roses delivered to me. If you thought I was kidding when I said my dad talks in the third person here is proof:





Here's hoping your Mother's Day was fantabuloso! Mine most definitely was.

Tony Danza strikes again...

Remember this post where we talked about misheard lyrics? Well, after reading more of Test Pattern, the MSNBC site I mentioned in my previous post, they were also talking about misheard lyrics. I just finished reading the article and was chuckling at everyones comments and their OWN misheard lyrics when someone mentioned the Pussycat Dolls song, "When I Grow Up". Turns out their misheard lyric is also my misheard lyric. Since I first heard the song I've been singing:

When I grow up
I wanna see the world
Drive nice cars
I wanna have boobies.

Guess what? They don't want to have boobies. They want to have groupies. My bad. I guess I just assumed that since they are the whores that are The Pussycat Dolls, they have wanted to have silicone tits their whole lives. Wait till I tell Adam. He's been singing about boobies this whole time too. Now I feel a little bit better about putting that song on my seven year-old's iPod.

Oh, also the article said a lot of people have misheard Beyonce's song, "All The Single Ladies". They are hearing, "All the Pringle haters! All the Pringle haters!" That cracks me up, yo!

You gotta problem with that?

Yes, I know I said in one of my last posts that I was going to do something new and fabulous and that every Tuesday I was going to hand you a shiny new website to check out and the world was going to rotate in the direction your life is actually going and the planets were going to align for you and maybe you'd even win the lottery. Not a big lottery but enough so you could go on a nice vacation and put a decent deposit down on that dark blue Jeep Liberty you've been eyeing. Then the following Tuesday happened and where was the shiny new website and the mediocre lottery win? Well if they were up your ass you'd know it. OK, that's a bad answer but the next time one of your kids asks where their other shoe is or where is one of the 52 pencils you bought them at the end of last summer for the start of school, that's actually a pretty GREAT answer.

"Mom, where's my Webkin?"
"If it was up your ass you'd know it."

"Do you know where my backpack is?"
"If it was up your ass you'd know it."

"Where's the remote?"
"If it was up your ass you'd know it."

See?

Anyway, I'm back one week and two days late with the next installment of "Check it out Tuesday."

This week's website comes to us courtesy of MSNBC's Test Pattern site. I love this site because the writers are typically saying what I'm thinking. Every Monday, or almost every Monday they do a "Multi-link Monday". I have found so many cool sites from it. This week I want you to check out Foamigami. After that I want you to do some foamigami, take pictures and report back to me. Do it, it's 65% of your grade.

NO!

NO! Not Lil' Kim and Derek! Ty Murray sucks ass! I hate you voters of DWTS! You totally ruined my Tuesday night.

On a completely different note: do you think Adam would notice if I drank his Gatorade that's been calling me from the refrigerator ALL DAY? I bet it tastes GOOD.